fairytale .

Cinta Kita ♥

2010-08-20T23:14:00.003+08:00

Love reminds you that nothing else matters
First and foremost, Happy 1st month dearest dy. Time flies so fast that i hardly notice that we're 1 months old together already. I know that ive been endlessly provoking you with my insecurities and accusation. Nontheless, i realise that somehow or another i still need to believe in you and have trust and faith that youre a change man. No longer the old you who flings around. And with god's willing, everything will be alright (: Last but not least, I thank you for enduring my nonsensical behaviour and shitty attitude. Plus, endlessly reminding me how much you love and doesnt wish to lose me. So dy, trust in me that i do love you with all my heart and doesnt wish to lose you either . In addition, I really hopeful to last long with you. I wont mention the name forever, 'cause forever is like a curse to love. I love you Khairul Anwar ♥♥♥

Today was a kickass day for me with love. Arcade > breakfast @ downtown > Pool > arcade. Baby i swear i did had so much fun & joy. We had our laughters for almost the whole day. Thank you love for everything today. I won 4 - 0 because he gave me so much chances. -.-" Dy, you better stop it lah please ! Anyway, my blogsong is specially for you or maybe for us ? =D I know im sweeter than honey ! hees ^^V

Much Love ,
airaa ♥

airplanes

2010-08-15T23:57:00.003+08:00

I want to stop complaining on how little time i get from dy . I want to stop being self - centered and only thinks about my wants and need . I prolly should stop being like this right now , right this instant . I do things which he dislikes , promised to stop doing it but yet still doing it . Just whats gotten into me ?! Wake up edaa ! If this is how you want to be behave , he'll leave you for good . Do you actually want that ? What happened to the old you ? The old you who sticks to one and knows the meaning of losing someone you love ? The old you who doesnt dares to contact other except for your very own ? Where has she gone too ?! The ans for all that ; I DONT FUCKING KNOW ! After the deep scars i had , i never knew the meaning of hurt any longer . I never knew what im doing is right or wrong . Everything just gone haywire . I'm sorry dy , i never meant to hurt you . I never meant to be this way . Im trying to change but you arent there to help me out . Who else should i seek if its not you ? But youre just too busy , not noticing me here struggling to get back on track . You only see me showing my attitude . Behind those , what do i actually seek for ? Your attention ! Can i pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars . I could really use a wish right now . I need you badly dy but you just wont notice it *saddestface* D':

sugar baby

2010-08-09T01:11:00.005+08:00

No other being can fully understand what another has lived through. We can only offer compassion, support, and the gift of seeing beyond the trauma to the being. Animals experience traumatic stress too, so as we humans. I could vividly remember the dead cat i witnessed right with my own bare eyes. One day it was so weak and the next day you see , it is filled with red ants. White tongue sticking out and frozen body. The most forlorn incident ever. D:

Let's move along now. Been meeting love♥ for 3 consecutive weeks already! OMG, break record okay! Today initial plan was not to meet since he just came back from fishing with his family however that cute boy text me up and asked me to meet up at his place. Therefore, me & seri headed down to his crib. Coincidencely, seri's grandma lived at the same block. Such small world indeed :D Slacked while watching tekken till 8.30pm. Cabbed home since seri got extra bux, besides shes in a hurry to get back home. Not to forget, today played pool with seri and i won almost all games *bigwidesmile* i likeeeeee. Now, i want to try and beat love♥ in pool. (Y)

definitely cant wait for tomorrow !! Watching fireworks with someone i love is what ive been wanting for my entire life and finally with god's willing, am able to do so with love♥, seri & mooore. This shall be very anticipating i guess *jumpsaround* Love♥ is having his handsome sleep. Meanwhile, im here trying to get myself to sleep and get ready for tomorrow. Speaking of tomorrow, i swear i dont have any freaking idea what to wear. Mygod, can someone please help me out here? :d

Sidetrack; I wish i can get this feeling off. I wish i can get rid of this paranoia. Its such a great burden on my shoulder. Trying by all means and ways to get it off & make things better. In addition, ive been endlessly accusing love♥ for something which i reckon he actually even did it. But please, dont make me look bad here. am not the one to be blame, its the guys. Theyre the one who made me have so little confidence and self - esteem. Despite all those 'mantras', advices from friends and such, things still remain the same. And yes, i swear i hate it too. Maybe, just maybe i need some time to get things right. I know love♥ had been so patient towards me, putting up with all my nonsensical attitudes. Therefore, i thank you love for enduring these ugly attitude of mine. Like what i said, i dont care what they said 'cause im in love with you khairul anwar ♥♥

Goodnight people & sweetdream love .

oh love

2010-08-07T22:44:00.000+08:00

Forget about all the reasons why something may not work. You only need to find one good reason why it will.

Had a helluva time today with dearest love♥ , seri , mul & mal . Initial plan was to head to grandlink for some karaoke session however the plan backfire and so we decided to catch a movie instead . Watched salt @ shaw cs and mygod , the queue was damn long . Finally able to buy the tix thats at 1.30pm . Apparently , we got seperated as theres no more 5 seats available left . Love♥ and me were the one seperated from them . yes , sodeh or what . I shall give the movie a two thumbs up and a rating of 5/5 . Seriously , its definitely worth the 6 bux ! Afterwhich , headed to usual place to makan then slack at tamp 1 rooftop . At 5.30pm , Mulyanah aparted from us first . We then head to meet up with seri's mom . After some window shopping , we chillax at coffeebean and talktalktalk . So much fun !!!!!!!!!! Love♥ treated me to everything today . Thank you so much ! Love you muchmuch (: Then headed home @ 8.30pm , love♥ sent me home ^^V

Fasting month is drawing nearer . Im left with approximately 4 days left to spend time with love♥ afterwhich for atleast a month we wont be meeting . Its because we both wants to fast full month this time round (apart from me , having my menstruation). Nonetheless , we still will meet up once for awhile to break fast togethergether (: hehs .

Im starting work next two weeks @ national sailing centre . I swear i have no freaking idea where is it . The good or should i say awesome news is that , we the workers will be getting a free tix to Universal Studion on our last day of duty . Mygod , its Universal Studio !! The place ive been wanting to go for donkey months . And FINALLY able to go for FREEEEE ! Doesnt that just spells awesome to you . (Y) Okay i better get my beauty sleep right now . Love♥ will go balistic if he knows im not sleeping yet . Goodnight people & Sweetdream love♥ ~

xoxo

new chapter begins

2010-07-23T23:49:00.002+08:00

something 'bout l o v e
Ive finally moved on . Ive realised that its over between him & me . Ive realised that ive been silly all these months . Ive realised how much ive been used by you times & again . Youre just a bag of lies , so full of it . After so much of contemplating , ive finally decide to give love a second chance . I hope he'll mean every single word he said . I hope he wont leave me like HE did . I hope this is just not another game of his . People might disapprove me with him , maybe just maybe . But i dont care , its my life anyway . I think everyone deserved a second chance . (:

Today , as we had planned . Played pool for 2 hours . Definitely had a helluva time with all of them ; me , love , mal , mul , seri & anip . Sadly ziey wasnt able to tag along . Nevermind , theres still next time ! Afterwhich , chillax at mac cafe . Love sent me home as usual . And now that bonchet is asleep , without telling me! -.- thanks eh B ! haha . He's currently down with fever , so dont blame him at all . Get well soon sayang ! Speaking of which , I just recovered from my illness a couple weeks back and now im sick AGAIN . OMG ~ something is so wrong with my immune system . __

A friend of mine has organised a birthday pit cum party tomorrow over at East Coast . Im contemplating whether i should go or not . Firstly , its at east coast . Secondly , it starts only at 8pm . So , i really dont know . Besides theres YOG stuffs tomorrow . Mygod ! And love is working tomorrow till 5pm . No fun ): We'll just see how things goes tomorrow . Really need my beauty sleep right now .

xoxo .

F U C K YOU {!}

2010-07-17T02:08:00.003+08:00

All my scars are open .

Today was an ultimate fun despite the time constrain we had . Initial plan was to head to grandlink to karoake but sadly , our little nice voices were down at the moment due to sore throats & such . Therefore , we changed our plan to play POOL instead . Won 2 games over the 3 games i played . My skills are improving . I like !! ^^V More pool game pleaaaaaase c:

Yesterday was a fucked up day for me . Like so many shits keep happening to me . Well the worst was knowing that everything was just a damn fucking game to them . That they've planned it all along and silly me to not realise it right from the beginning . I know theres no use crying over a spilk milk , but nonetheless the anger in me is hardly able to subside . I only wish that one fine day someone will teach them a real great lesson . A lesson they'll remember for ever and remembered what they did to me . What goes around comes around . You can go ahead and laugh as much you can . Feel the damn satisfaction while it last . 'cause soon , it'll be my turn laughing & definitely my satisfaction will be greater than yours . You guys are no biggie . Trust me , one day someone will bring you guys down . And i cursed you two , that you'll be hurting even much more than me in the future with the guy/girl youre in love with . A real (fillintheblanks) dont treat girls like neither dolls nor trash . They treat them with respect and love . You guys are such a MAJOR LOSER JERK(S) . HAHA !

xoxo .

eclipse

2010-07-13T23:34:00.002+08:00

Finally watched ECLIPSE with slutbby last sunday @ cs . And i swear its worth every penny . A rate of 5/5 and two thumbs up . Can i watch it agaaain please ? hahs . Ate at my all time favourite place - Qiji , then slack at usuals . Karoake session was an ultimate blast ! More of it can ? I want to sing till i lose my voice or better still a husky voice will be AWESOME ! c:
Okay , i dont know whats gotten into me lately . Ive not been thinking straight and obviously not making any right decision . Some said im hurt thats why , and some others said im just trying to hurt myself even deeper . That , i really have no idea . I have no answers to those questions given by some . Theres things in life i wish i could delete . Things in life i wish i doesnt have to go through . I just want my happy life back . I just want to smile for real , not fake it . I just want my laughters . But sadly , its gone everysince that very day . No , im not blaming him still . Just unable to let go as it hurts me way too deep . Not even once did i forgotten about you and our sweet memories . Im not gonna say please come back 'cause thats not gonna happened . Nor do i wish it to happen . We'll be good friends forever . rhd&ndmy (: I really thank you for everything you've done . 280109 , will always be in my heart .

xoxo .

almost love

2010-07-05T23:50:00.002+08:00

I GET A RUSH
MORE THAN A CRUSH
ALMOST LOVE ♥♥♥

E V O L L O V E

2010-06-20T20:06:00.001+08:00

"Because love keep letting us down. We tend to build walls instead of bridges."

HEYYY c:
Finally watched 2 movies after idontknowhowmany donkey months . Watched killers on friday @ ehub with mimiedear, Iqal & fadbabe ! The guy is freaking hot and the movie was freaking awesome & hilarious . And then today , watched karate kid @ yishun ! Finally am able to watch it ! damn , it was a great movie . Now, feel like learning some fighting skills ^^ (which i know is definitely impossible) hahah .

Will be starting work this tuesday ! So sexcited about it but in the same time quite nervous . hahs. Finally some mollah coming in after so long . Made plans to do my hair , but i still have to give it a thought . Sidetracked ; I CANT WAIT FOR ECLIPSE . wonder who'll be my date for the day . HAHAH !

xoxo

M&N

2010-06-17T01:58:00.002+08:00

A short convo between me & mr m

Mister M ,
i can still vividly remember the first time i met you @ tamp . Tho' you were schooling at ite dover that point of time , it was definitely sweet of you to come all the way down to tamp just to meet me . The date we got to know each other was 7 may '10. Yes , i even remembers the date . I remembers every single moments we had . The 3 hours late , the moments slacking at 213 , the inside jokes we had, the laughers, the slacking part at your place . Everything is such a sweet memory till its impossible for me to forget about it . It's such a pity that when i thought you're different from others , you proved me wrong the next moment . You were such a great guy , really . But your lies changes everything . Regarding the convo above , i cried right after you said all those . 'Cause believe me , youre not the only who miss the moments we had . And i miss you too but now its all too late . We can only be friends , nothing more nothing less . I wish the best for you both . I will never forget you nemo .

Mister N,
I know i shouldnt be updating about you anymore. But i have too. It's not because i want you to read it (which im not sure if you still do) but i need to express what i feel. I'll be lying if i said i forgotten about you . I'll be lying if i said i dont miss you at all . And i'll be lying if i said there no love for you anymore . I still do, everyday without fail . 1yr2months might be nothing to you but its really something to me. Something big, something precious which means so much to me. The memories we build, the love we build for the past 1yr2months is definitely unforgettable. I dont care if you hate me right now eversince you know what. Seriously, i dont care. Because for all i know, i can never bring myself to hate you. Maybe for you, its easy to hate your ex . But not for me. I wish the best for you both too . I will never forget you ex - c i n t a D:

xoxo .

heyy c:

2010-06-13T17:42:00.003+08:00

hey yo ! Been weeks huh since i last updated ? hehs . apologies to all my avid readers . Been busy with school & exam lately . BUT finally , EXAMS OVER !!!! *jumps around* Friday was my major exam , BEV . And only god knows how tough it was but nevertheless i still managed to answer all of it . I have this instincts that ill get a B for it . Or worst still , a C . Let's put that aside since its OVER c: Curretly over at seri's crib . Waiting for her to get ready to go out and slack . SLOOOOW .
Anyhoots , ignore my previous post . So emoish and fuck it , he's a complete jerk . Lesson learn edaa . Get it straight it your damn head will ya' ! I guess i'll update soon . Take care yehs c:

love .

sometimes.

2010-06-04T22:44:00.002+08:00

sometimes i wish i have the power to turn back time. sometimes i wish i have the power to go to the future. sometimes i wish i have the power to read peoples mind. sometimes i wish i have the power to know peoples feeling. sometimes.....sometimes i wish he could hear what my heart says. Very complicated as it may seems, im unsure where we're going to now. Everyday my mind keeps having those negative thoughts and those phobias keep coming back. sometimes i wish theres only me. sometimes i wish you could just tell me frankly what you think about me. sometimes i want to give up on trying but on the other hand, i afraid of losing you. Theres too many 'what ifs' in my mind. I guess, for now let the way things are. Enjoy the moments spent with him and cherish every moment. 'Cause i might never know, tomorrow might be the day he'll be leaving DDDD: yet i never failed to pray, that he wont....

xoxo .

walk away, M

2010-05-23T01:03:00.002+08:00

And one of the hardest things i ever had to do was say goodbye to someone i never thought i would have too .

Happy birthday to you ! Dear M ,
You left without explaining yourself and left me hanging . You said you wont hurt me , 'cause i never hurt you . Now , even when i didnt hurt you , you hurt me with your lies . You made me believe in you , trust you . And this is what i got in the end . You gave me false hopes , thanks so much . I wont forget our memories even though it was just for awhile . take care ...

I dont have to say much . 3 heartpain . Spells great to you ? Darn it !!!!

let it go .

2010-05-16T23:01:00.004+08:00

saying that you'll forget him is totally easier than doing it .it's not the word forget that you need to focus on ,however it's the word letting go that you need to focus .You might be thinking that forgetting him is the right thing to do but no its not. why dont you try to let it go & take him as a memory,a sweet memory, a fainting past in your romance book? let go of whatever you guys used to have but you really shouldnt forget him because its impossible.learn to let go,because only then you'd be able to face your problem.letting go doesnt mean forgetting.forcing yourself to forget someone is the same as remembering them.

I remember clearly i used to say that to someone who's unable to forget the other someone . And now i realise, that should applies to me too. I shouldnt forget him, just let go. And its true, no matter how much i tried to forget about him it's impossible . Worst still, i'll be remembering him instead . Yes edaa. It's time you let go of this. Smile & laugh like how you used too before you met him. People who loves you doesnt like to see you being like this . You can do it , i know you can !

On a brighter note , my dearest nemo have been putting a smile on my face eversince
7 may 2010 ! Certain people knows whose this nemo im talking about . Dearest, i thank you for bringing back my smile which i lost eversince that awful night . I dont know how im going to feel if i lose you . Thanks for everything dear ! I miss you so much ! Meet up soon please c:

xoxo.

new and fresh

2010-05-15T20:58:00.002+08:00

Finally found something that i want . Tadaaa ~ Took me ages to find a perfect one . Anyhoots , exams are drawing nearer !! Like ftw =.=" So not prepared yet especially for BEV . Pressure pressure pressure ! Must start revising starting next monday ! haha . Lazy ass c:

My dearest sweethearts might be wondering how im doing right now . Whether im fine or feeling blue eventhough its not monday . Hahs . Dont worry too much people , ill be fine veryvery soon . I know im able to get over this real soon . The scars will forever remain tho' . But i must say its an achievement for me for not thinking about him the entire day today ! Yay me . Go edaa gooooo ~

Im off to watch Down with love . and ohh i miss my leg ;DDD

Last note

2010-05-14T21:55:00.002+08:00

I might be changing the skins soon . Im still sick till now and it'd been almost a week . My cough is getting worst ! I keep coughing which led me to vomiting . I dont like medicines but what should i do to get better ? Shit keeps happening to me but i believe that im strong enough to overcome it . For every hurt that you've caused ,i wont ever forget it . For everything that you did , i wont ever forget it either . This is a great blow i ever have to dealt with .And thanks to you for realising me that guys are forever the same . Words are just words to them . Promises are just something for them to play around with . And im just a toy you'll play when you're bored .
To ex-boyf, i swear that this shall be the very last time you ever see me talking about you . Since this is exactly what you wish for , im letting things to be in your way . I cant be bothered anymore to hold on to something which i knew is impossible . I'll never want to hear about you ever again in my entire life . Your cruelty changed me to someone i dont want to be . Bitch about me for all i care , i dont give a hoot anymore . I know its the standard procedure for a guy to say sweet words people when they're in love with you then start bitching about you when they hate you . At the end of the day , we girls will always be the one looking bad . Keep blaming me for everything . Tell them how i sucks to be the girl you ever wanted . Tell them how i sucks to make you happy . Tell them how much pain i've caused you , how much scars i left you . Tell them how little sacrifices i made and how much sacrifices you made . Tell them how much my attitude sucks . Tell them how little ive put my ego aside and otherwise for you . Tell them how little i loved you and how much you loved me . Tell them , go ahead . Just spit it all out . Tell your new girlfriend how much much fucking much more better she is than this fucking bitch ! Hate me forever ? So be it , i dont give a damn fuck . I sucks damn alot , so i deserve to be hate by you and by anyone . Dont you worry , i wont beg you anymore to stay . This shameless bitch doesnt deserve a fucking chance anymore . Thanks for every single thing and memories . Forget about me . Oh wait , i dont have to tell , its been done (: Take care !

sincerely ;
BITCH (:

That should be me

2010-05-14T21:31:00.002+08:00

Everybody's laughing in my mind
Rumors spreading 'bout this other ~~guy~~girl
Do you do what you did when you did with me
Does heshe love you the way I can
Did you forget all the plans that you made with me
Cause baby I didn't

That should be me holding your hand
That should be me making you laugh
That should be me this is so sad
That should be me
That should be me
That should be me feeling your kiss
That should be me buying you gifts
This is so wrong
I can't go on
'Till you believe
That that should be me
That should be me

You said you needed a little time from my mistakes
It's funny how you used that time to have me replaced
~~Did you think that I wouldn't see you out at the movies~~
What you doin' to me
You're taking ~~him~~her where we used to go
Now if you're trying to break my heart
It's working cause you know

That that should be me holding your hand
That should be me making you laugh
That should be me this is so sad
That should be me
That should be me
That should be me feeling your kiss
That should be me buying you gifts
This is so wrong I can't go on
'Till you believe
That should be me

I need to know should I fight for love
Or disarm
It's getting harder to shield
This pain in my heart

Ooh Ooh

That should be me holding your hand
That should be me making you laugh
That should be me this is so sad
That should be me
That should be me
That should be me feeling your kiss
That should be me buying you gifts
This is so wrong
I can't go on
'Till you believe
That that should be me

Holding your hand
That should be me
The one making you laugh (oh baby oh)
That should be me

That should be me
Giving you flowers
That should be me
Talking for hours
That should be me (that should be me)
That should be me

That should be me
~~Never~~ should've let you go
I ~~never~~ should've let you go
That should be me
I ~~never~~ shoulda let you go
That should be me

for you from me .

2010-05-10T20:53:00.003+08:00

Im back blogging people ! Have been mia for a few days or should i say weeks due to a certain reason . Tho' love life have been a total bitch for me lately , im still standing strong 'cause i believe well in karma . It definitely hurts me damn alot but whattado , just have to deal with it . AND yes , i can admit this . IM OVER IT ! I know theres no point dwelling on it , hurting myself even deeper when the person on the other hand is enjoying himself . And to you , i dont care if you happens to read this and you start hating me . I had enough of caring/looking after your heart whereas mine have been step all over times and again . Im happy for you that you've replaced me oh-so easily . a big CONGRATS to you dude . Since she's the ideal person you've looking for , treasure her well . Hope she love you more than the way i used to love you . Nevertheless , i , rahidah bte roslan will like to thank you for all the things we've shared , the memories we build and the heartpain you caused for those 1yr2months . It was a great pleasure meeting you , knowing you and loving you but it was even much more a great dissapointment that my love for you doesnt meant a thing to you . I may sound like a bitch , you know why ? Because this is exactly what happened when you broke me down so badly . Thank you very much ex-boyf . May you be happy always .

sincerely ,
edaa (:

you still love him, don't you ?

2010-04-29T20:09:00.001+08:00

well obviously . how can that love i had for him for 1year3months vanish into thin air just like that. why ?

Spit it out .

LAWL

2010-04-26T21:06:00.000+08:00

Formspring reply ;

You seem like you cant live without your boyfriend for just one day

if i cant live without my boyfriend for just one day, ill be dead by now . 'cause i dont have a boyfriend currently . So what can you say now ? HAH !

nice and easy

2010-04-21T20:15:00.002+08:00

School has been alittle bit mundane . There's too much theory and i hate theory . It sucks big time . Everything sounds such a bore which only leads me to dozing off . That's not a very good or bright thing to do , but whattado just cant help it . There's poa homework to do plus there's also poa test tomorrow . darn it . I musn't give up especially when its just the beginning . Must. endure. till. the. end. ;DD

On a brighter note , will be meeting smelly love tomorrow !!!! Me can't wait dohhs . I realised that ever since he starts working at c4 , we only managed to meet every thursday of the week . And sometimes monday or tuesday if both of us end early . Sayang , i miss spending time with you lah ! Dont make me angry tomorrow can ? I dont want any arguements , just happy moments please ! Love is such a sweetie ya'know . On monday , slack at the usual place then had a downpour . So i called love to pick me up and he really did . Thanks love for everything !! And surprisingly , we managed to sort things out in a very nice way . When i said very , i meant superb very . We shall do it like that more often . Talk things out nicely & COMPROMISE ! hehs . 1 week left . hehs ^^V

xoxo .

gone and back

2010-04-20T20:45:00.004+08:00

A big apologies to all for the lack of updates . Been feeling damn fatigue from the beginning of school . Higher nitec is definitely not as easy as nitec . Imagine starting school at 8am EVERYDAY . ZOMG ! Im always lack of sleep therefore ill look like a zombie at class . Everyday theory, theory and more more theory . I really hope im able to cope 'cause right now , i can really feel the pressure already . 2 years is a long period of time for me . Wish me all the best people :DDDDDD
Anw, just abit of randomness . I think im getting skinnier . Like ftw ! hate it . i want to have abit more fats please .

Many shits happened lately . Tears were shed , words of anger were said , vulgarities too but nevertheless we managed to solved it once and for all . Complicated it is but i know deep down in me , i know who i truly love . Like you said, let time decides . So i shall wait for that very day . I still love you like how i love you right from the start . Sorry for all the things and words i said . Meet up soon please !!! I miss your warmth presence DDDDD:

Formspring Reply ;

Any haters in mind - anonymos

I do actually . a couple of people . Be it guys or girls (:

Admin

2010-04-14T22:32:00.002+08:00

Apologies for not updating lately . Monday April 12th was my first day of school . The best thing was me , molly ,sna & farah are in the same class !!! And the funny part was farah sat at the wrong class . Couldn't stop laughing . She actually sat at accounting classes , farah..farah. 2 words to describe the orientation ; FUCKING BORE . Like seriously , last year orientation was way much fun . On a brighter note, everyone seems to get along well with each other . Be it the chinese or the malays. 2 new friend in our group ; honey & syimah . Best or what ? haha ! Okay i my lazy mode is ON . So i dont feel like elaborating on the other days . This year , must extra doubly hard . Tho' the subject(s) seems to be quite a bore . But by hook or crook , still have to study it . AND i have to take my worst subject ; POA ! Like omg , must start from scratch . I forgotten almost everything already . ):

ps; I re-read the bittersweet post. I want those times back please . You wont ever realise how much i love you nadzmiy . )':

i miss you! will you meet me soon? (:

2010-04-12T20:34:00.001+08:00

of course dear . meet up when we're both free for whatever we are currently busy with now . much misses love (L)

Spit it out .

random much ?

2010-04-10T18:31:00.002+08:00

hihii ((:

currently @ seri's crib . Initial plan was her to slack at my area but since the plan backfire, i met at her crib instead . Huge sacrification right ? LAWLS ~ waiting impatiently right now for her to finish getting ready to go out . Let's just see for how long she's gonna take to get ready aye . *shakeshead*

I cant wait for school to resume . Ive been waiting for this for donkey months . Most importantly cant wait to go school with molly !!!! Speaking of school, i dont even know where the heck my school uniform is . I need to get ready my school uniform by tomorrow . So sExcited for mondaaaaaay ! Ah on that day, theres carrefour outing too . Guess have to give it amiss UNLESS they change the date . I know im talking random stuff right now 'case im currently b o r e d !!!

I want go universal studio SOON please . baby, i want go i want go i want gooooo !
haha . Heard second sis is going there today with her bf . So very unfair ! pfft. And i also feel like pampering myself with manicure & pendicure . The only thats getting the way is mollah . Im damn broke right now . I got so many things to do with so little mollah . damn it lah . Cant wait to watch down with love tonight ! hahaha . random shitzx. ciaos .

:)))))))

formspring.me

2010-04-10T02:31:00.001+08:00

Spit it out . http://formspring.me/edaasanji

learn to swollow it !

2010-04-09T20:26:00.003+08:00

It 1:52am right now and im still wide awake . I should have done this post long ago but i always got sidetracked . Anyhoots , love once told me not to put up my website at facebook as there's many nosy people out there . Well i finally decided that i dont give a damn fuck anymore . They want to read and go bitch about what i wrote , go ahead . They want to laugh when they read about my ' love story ' , i dont care ! These kind of people are just pathetic . Besides this is my blog , i have the very right to express whatever . They're just nosy people who definitely loves poking their nose in other people life . So whattado , its their nature :DDD We can just sympathise such people .

Not everyone relationship is sweet . They have their ups and downs . Thats how we progress to a better one . But some people just take these oppurtunity to laugh . Laugh because we're having a relationship issue and maybe they even enjoying it . Yet they never realise that as much as they are laughing and enjoying it now , soon it will get back to them . Easy said , karma . These people are just envious of our love life , that's why they are trying their best to bring us down with their insignificant care and words . 2-sided bitch will always be 2-sided bitch . I can play this game as well .

So to whom it may concern , you feel a pinch with what ive just wrote & certainly unhappy about it . just formspring me , i'll be happy to entertain low - life bitch/jackass like you .

And to all my lovely people , my tagboard is not in use . Its there for no reason . So anything just formspring me alright .

xoxo.

a date i will remember .

2010-04-01T22:06:00.001+08:00

010410 is a hellaluva funfun day ! The date was a success & i definitely had so much joy . Everything seems lovely . Starbucks treat > swensen's treat > movie > to slacking > home . How to train your dragon 3D was a blast ! Rating 4.5/5. Worth our 14 bucks , right love ? Before that , had what ive been long craving for ; lasagne ! OMG , it was superb . Thank you so much love for everything plus the handphone pouch . 20 bucks is kinda expensive for merely a handphone pouch but you wouldnt mind as long as i love it . I know at the end of the day i kinda ruin the happy mode but whatever it is , i love you very much ! no guy have ever spend so much on me . Im very grateful & thankful dear !

xoxo .

2 in 1

2010-03-30T23:28:00.002+08:00

Yesterday was an hellaluva fun !!!! pool > central to makan > lepak > home ! I was asked by sis to be home by 7.30pm and shockingly i did ! YAY ME ~ hah I won 2 game of pool . Now my only wish is to bring love down. B, one day we shall have a game of pool aites . (:

Today serihunneh came over to my house . Watched adnan sempit for like the third time . I can actually mimic their lines . Afterwhich we just laze around & then decided to buy J.CO donuts . Headed down to Tamp 1 just to buy it . I know, SANGGUP kan ? heh. Reached home , showed her the kumar draq queen show . Laughed like hell till i could literally feel my own stomach bursting .

I cant wait for this 1st april . A date with lovelovelove ! We decided on following up with our initial plan . Like OMG ! 3D + Swensen's treat = L O V E ! Hope everything goes well & an early thanks to you dear for deciding to have this date . Im all sEXcited for it . Me cant wait ;DDDDDDDDDDDD Ah, speaking of love . He's a poor boy, he ate a bread that have fungy in it . Now he's having stomach pain and feeling quite unwell. Get well soon love . i dont want anything should happen to you. Me love you much much much ! mwahs !

xoxo .

oneyeartwomonths

2010-03-28T23:11:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 1YEAR2MONTH LOVECINTABOOBIE ♥♥♥
I know as days/months goes by our relationship becomes tougher and tougher . One problem after another but you know love i will never give up on you. Maybe i did left for merely awhile but that doesnt mean that ive given up . It wasnt easy for me to build this relationship of ours for this long . So letting it go down the drain just like that is definitely out of the question . I will stay strong and hope we'll be able to compromise . Trusting is also another key to a better relationship . Everything needs a step at time . Dont worry love, just hold on tight to my hand and never let go . We will go through thick & think , up & down , left & right together :) I know you love me as much as i love you boo .

xoxo.

ONE L O V E

2010-03-27T02:12:00.004+08:00

It seems things are getting better lately. Be it friendship, love or life . Finally, upin&ipin is back on track. & no, im not talking about that upin&ipin. I know we know public dont okay ;D " I tried to find a new gf but i couldnt find anyone cause no one could replace you in my heart ", " no one could care,love & understand me the way you do". Me love you ipin !! And another happy note, as ziey mention B.S.W is back on track too beybeh ! Double the happiness :) B.S.W & TogetherWeLove for life yeh !!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't wait for monday's outing with serihunneh plus on the 1st april will be going out for a date with lovelovelove. Yeh ! after so long, finally ! Swensens & how to train your dragon 3D, here we come:DDDDDDDDDD
And love, I know my attitude could be quite a bitch BUT please dont give up on me like how i never give up on you. Im trying to stop giving you shits & listen to you obediently. I dont want to make you fade away. It'll hurts me more than anything.I need you love . Many things had happened lately and i know everything is partly my fault.Im veryveryvery sorry love. 1 more day love ^^

I told myself to stop hating others. Hating wont make me look preety. And its not beneficial to me so what for ? I have better things to do then go around hating others. The anger inside me all these while will slowly fade away. Ill try to ignore the past and welcome the future with open arms. If i dont let go, the future wont come. True ? That's what love have been telling me all these while .Im sure things will progress to better for us. Boy, you know i love you !

xoxo.

Saranghamnida

2010-03-22T14:53:00.003+08:00

Pardon me for putting a korean song. I love the song !!! The lyrics are simply meaningful. It somehow conveys my thoughts. Enjoy (:

I miss you again, like yesterday.
Won’t this feeling of missing you, lessen any?
I keep thinking about you.

The more I try to sort through it all, the more the tears come.
Even when I try to steal it, the memories spread into
different memories through the tears that I shed.
It makes me cry so painfully.

All I can do is regret, because all I ever did was receive.
But I’m afraid you’ll forget me because I’ve never gave you anything.

I love you, I, I love you
These words have become a habit
and these words are among the many I’ve learned from you.
I sit around alone mumbling to myself like a fool.
I’m sorry truly, truly, I’m sorry.
I’m even sorry that these words are so late
But I’m waiting here for you shamelessly
Will you by chance come back tomorrow?

Even if the birdcage that represented you was narrow
I still liked it, I was still happy.
I’m returning to the day, to my dreams
when I believed in a forever without seperation

If I could go back I’d gather my heart, I’d take everything
from it and give it you.

I love you, I, I love you
These words have become a habit
and these words are among the many I’ve learned from you.
I sit around alone mumbling to myself like a fool.
I’m sorry truly, truly, I’m sorry.
I’m even sorry that these words are so late
But I’m waiting here for you shamelessly
Will you by chance come back tomorrow?

My heart..
In the end even if you can’t come
and you’ve changed and I’m not the one for you any longer
I’ll call and call out to you again
Like a parrot calling only your name..
Wishing for only your love like this

stay tune...

2010-03-22T00:12:00.003+08:00

I'll update as soon as possible !

apologies for the lack of updates .

miss me people :PPPPPPPPPP

hurts. enough please.

2010-03-17T23:03:00.003+08:00

I might be gone for a day or two. I might not be updating for a day or two. But ill miss you for more than a day or two. I wish and wish that things wont have to happen this way but sadly it did. I can only stop and cry.I cant do nothing else. Those steps seems heavy for me to make but i had too. Youre eager for it and so im not going to kill your eagerness.I thought nothing could bring us apart but there was something. I will not leave 'em and let it go. never. will.

I thought you and you will stay but you proved me wrong. so so wrong. I was deeply hurt with your words. You said i mean nothing to you and you wouldnt mind losing a friend like me. When all along ive took you as my very bestfriend. BUT no, im just a plain human being to you. Nothing more nothing less. You walk away without hesitation, so what more can i say ? Thank for the memories. Thanks for the advise. Thanks for everything you ever done for me.

And you, i dont know if its really goodbye. I might be the one who said goodbye but it was definitely the hardest thing to do. I dont want this and never will. I just wished for once you'll be truthful & faithful to me. Nothing more nothing less. Had you not done so, i wont made this decision. It was just a haste decision that i made. If i can, i wish you'll stay & change. Be the only one for me please.

Shit keep happening. so tell me, whose next ? tsk.

ALERT !

2010-03-12T22:23:00.002+08:00

Alert that im in moodswing right now. My mood keep changing drasticly. Little thing can really provoke me real bad. So please pardon me should i tries to trigger a fight. Im not in my very best mood due to a certain reason. As much as i want to ignore these feelings, i cant. This feeling is back hence im feeling at my lowest point.

Forgot to mention, watched Alice In Wonderland 3D with sis @ suntec city last saturday. It was worth my 14 bucks !!!! Should watch it if you guys havent done so. And right now, ill be watching dear john. Heard from a couple of people that it was good and touchy. So i shall check check it outzx ;D

Im still unsure if i should go out tomorrow with anyone who is free or just stay at home and watch more movies. Thought of meeting love tomorrow BUT as usual sadly hes working tomorrow. 3 consecutive days i wont be able to meet him. Monday ? Tuesday ? Thursday ? This 3 days is the only day that he is considered free from work but somehow i cant use it to meet him. Me dont know why either. THIS SUCKS BIG TIME BEYBEH !

xoxo.

eclipse

2010-03-12T22:18:00.000+08:00

I cant wait for this to be out in theatre ! A MUST TO WATCH !!!!!

playing with fire

2010-03-11T23:43:00.003+08:00

I couldnt get myself to sleep right now. My mind is full of unanswered questions. Everyone is fast asleep by now including love. So i guess im all alone right now, dealing these confusions alone. But its okay, afterall thats what ive been doing all these while.I think its enough for me to trouble people with my endless problem. They too have their own problems, agree?

I dont know how i should be feeling right now. upset ? furious ? or no feeling ? If this things were to happen bcause of me then its not right. I mean i know i had my limits. Actually there's no use blaming anyone right now. Its definitely pointless. You dont care then i shall also dont . Its unfair for me that you keep doing these things to me when you said otherwise. Sometimes i feel like shouting ' i give up ' but no, im not going to do that. Never will. Stop playing with fire. Just admit it, i know you did it. Dont let me see it with my own bare eyes.

xoxo

webelongtogether

2010-03-09T00:24:00.000+08:00

Today was a blast with love. Though initially love was damn fatigue but thankfully after letting him sleep for a few hours, he was considered okay. Had our 'shopping' at whitesand. Afterwhich, we grab a bite at mad jack ! The food was moderate. Next pay we'll eat swensen, okay love ;D Ive bought the things i wanted and i bought love a shoe too ! Glad that he likes it. I shall now let the pictures do the talking alright. Overall, me had lotsa fun ! thanks love !

Picture of the day is..........

xoxo.

(:

2010-03-08T01:10:00.002+08:00

I cant wait to know what hold upon me for this month. Last month was a shit ! Shit keeps happening to me & many unpleasant things happened. But thanks to ALLAH, everything is back to normal. Amin.

Im glad that we managed to get back together. When you're gone, i missed your existence and vice versa. I really dont wish to have another of this to happen ever again. Twice is definitely enough, agree ?Let's learn from our mistake shall we and try our utmost best not to repeat it again. I've really realised that i will be at my lost without you. Though i may appear to be smiling, laughing etc.. Deep down im hurting badly and feeling so lost & empty. You were there for me for 1year1month, so how can i possibly able to live without you in just a blink of an eye. Its impossible, definitely impossible. I will always love you boo (:

Higher nitec registration is done last friday. I now cant wait for school to commence on the 12 april. I need to get my shoes & hair cut done. That shall be done prolly on this tuesday with lovelovelove (: Ive been wanting to get myself a new phone but i keep getting sidetracked. Pfft ~ So i made my mind to change my plan instead. And so it means, i have to talk to dad about this. I hate this part right here, pronto !

xoxo.

devastated

2010-02-27T23:57:00.002+08:00

When you know that your very own goodfriend doesnt bothers to reply your back, it's the cue to get the hell out of her away. It means shes sick of you, so you better leave.

I hate what im feeling right now. I hate it when i feel so broken. Keep blaming me. Yeh i know my attitude sucks big time but sadly people who you thought could accept it no matter what shits you gave, finally gave up on you. Does that spells great to you huh ? So readers, when theres someone who said they will stay no matter what shits you gave. dont believe every words they said. You might never know, one day they will really leave. At that moment, you could do nothing but feel devastated.
Hate me so much ? Say it in my face ! & i will leave.

Y O U

2010-02-20T00:53:00.002+08:00

You were there to light my days
you were there to guide me through
From my days down and on
I'll never stop thinking of you
How can i forget all that
When you're the one who make me smile
You'll always be a part of me
How i wish you were still mine.

Never will forget the day
How we've met and came this far
We all know we got this feeling but
somehow it has to end up here
I know its me who said goodbye
And thats the hardest thing to do
Cause you mean so much to me
And guide the truth from me to you

For all the things i've done and said
For all the hurt that i've caused you
I hope you will forgive me baby
Cause that wasnt what i meant to do

You were there to light my days
you were there to guide me through
From my days down and on
I'll never stop thinking of you
How can i forget all that
When you're the one who make me smile
You'll always be a part of me
How i wish you were still mine.

For all the things i've done and said
For all the hurt that i've caused you
I hope you will forgive me baby
Cause that wasnt what i meant to do

You were there to light my days
you were there to guide me through
From my days down and on
I'll never stop thinking of you
How can i forget all that
When you're the one who make me smile
You'll always be a part of me
How i wish you were still mine.

xoxo

busy mode Ergh !

2010-02-14T01:11:00.003+08:00

Love isn't the ability to give some and expect all.It's the ability to give all and expect none, and be strong enough to endure it.
I must be insane to still be awake at this time but whattado, i have this tendency to stay wide awake till the wee hours even though i've yawned for a couple of times. No freaking idea why but thats what i've been doing eversince....you know what.Do you know what's the equation for 140210 ? Lemme tell you, it's easy ya'know =DDDD
Chinese new year + Valentines Day + Seri Yusreen 18th birthday = 140210
cool much ? i know. So dearest seri, Happy 18th birthday to you. &greatly appreciated for spending your time yesterday with me. We (me,you & ziey) shall definitely go out one day alright? Just like good ol'times. B.S.W ♥♥

Im still thinking if i should get another job but i really dont know what kind of job & where. pfft~ let's push that aside. I cant wait for my pay to be in !!!!!! On a brighter note, i got to know from ipin that theres NO double pay tomorrow. The reason was because chinese new year falls on sunday. HAHA. Very lame i tell you but on the hand im just V glad =DDDDDDDD && ipin, i guess you had fun yesterday with you know who :D (kening naik naik) Anw, got to meet love for merely awhile just now as i has to pass the earpiece to him. Gosh ! i miss him V alot DD:
Thursday will be the only time we might be meeting, so it means 1 week of not meeting each other. egrh! s u c ks ! Guess wont be celebrating Vday since...... someone is just TOO busy with work.

xoxo

one lonely girl

2010-02-13T00:43:00.002+08:00

I always wish you were right beside me all the time
I don't know how else i can express what im feeling. Nobody cares to listen to what i have to say. Everyone is just busy with their own stuffs & work till they dont have the time to spare for me. This include love. He's busy working & schooling. And we hardly get the chance to talk on the phone. The only person left is me, rotting at home feeling so forlorn & empty. Just the thought that love is happyily working just saddens me because i definitely miss working there. Even though standing for long hours tires me, i still love the job. I keep repeating my words dont you think ? I just have to accept the damn fact that i won't be working there anymore. This sucks, damn it does.

I feel that i should find another job inorder to stop bothering others who's busy working. I feel that i should just shut up and deal with it.I feel that im gonna die soon due to boredom. I feel that i should stop talking nonsensical stuff. I feel that im a loner. I feel that love wont have time for me. I feel like crying. I feel like swearing. I feel like....I feel like...ergh !!!
i shall put a stop to this. DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD:

xoxo

not a title

2010-02-12T02:55:00.003+08:00

Girlfriend isn't a title, it's a promise.

Everyday i keep on thinking why my life seems to be this way. When afterall i only ask for is love, nothing more. Yet, things never get better infact it grown worse. Eversince the day i end my work, i've been a total bummer. Nothing seems right in whatever i do & say. And sometimes i just feel like giving up but then i think back, love wouldnt want me to give up. He never favors the word ' give up '. But tell me, how am i able to stay strong, think positive when noone is around to motivate me. All they do is keep on bringing me down with their words. I had enough. I just feel like screaming & relax my mind but NO i can't. Nothing i do gonna work. This pressure is killing me for sure. I just wish someone understand me. Understand what im going through. But who will ? ......

am still contemplating whether i should find another job or just rot at home . Im still waiting patiently for my pay to be in. And that's another headache. am not sure if i should just get myself a new phone or do something with my hair . Some say i should just buy a new phone, another says i should do something with my hair & theres also who says i should do both.Gosh. Pressure man pressure ! if i were to buy a new phone, the problem is what phone should i buy ? & if i should do my hair, what kind of style should i do ? This is kinda frustrating acutally . I.need.help.please ?
DDDDDD:

Anyhoots, ive been watching all kinds of seriel drama. Be it japanese or korean drama. && i think im in love with this cute guy. He's a japanese actor tho'.

（私は）あなたと恋におちました。
　 (Watashi wa) anata to koi ni ochi mashita. :DDDDD

E N D

2010-02-09T23:35:00.002+08:00

I know i've been MIA for awhile due to work but hey, im back for good.It's all because i quit working there. Reasons ? Trust me, its not me who want it. i know some people know, pronto. Thinking that i wont be able to work there anymore just saddens me alot but whattado. That's life. Im sure im gonna miss working that place, miss being a staff there, working with fun supervisors and colleagues & especially going work with love & mimie. It all ends yesterday night. Hold back my tears when i bid farewell to some of my supervisors and colleagues. Radha, morhan, carole, nadia, jeeva, devi, i definitely wont forget you guys. Thank you for the moments we had, the laughter, the anger and the nagging. & radha, whatever you said yesterday really brought me to tears. I know everything that you guys did are simply for my own benefit. Therefore i thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Dearest ipin, from today onwards you'll have to go to work alone without me. Im gonna miss going work with you, going home with you, gossiping about irritating customers, laughing at each other sillyness, shouting to one another across the place and the list goes on....Have a happy working life ahead.I wont be there to help you in times of need. DDDDDD:

I know i should stop dwelling this matter but i never seems to be able too. The sadness im feeling can never be imagine. Every single hope/wish crushed in a blink of an eye. Every single memories stays vividly in my mind. My very first job in my entire life. Thats simply the reason for this emotional post. You're not me, so you wont know the joy when i first gotten this job. It was a last resort job. Yet, i never regretted working there.

twelve months

2010-01-29T00:28:00.002+08:00

HAPPY 1 YEAR ANNIVERSARY LOVE

I love today and im sure ill love 4th feb more ;DDDD

that girl

2010-01-25T23:48:00.002+08:00

" I want to be the girl who he thinks is the cutest. Not necessarily the “hottest” or the “prettiest”, but the cutest. Because hotness refers to the body, and God knows mine isn’t perfect. Pretty refers to the face and I know plenty of girls prettier than me. But cuteness is referring to every imperfection that he loves. Every weird little habit. The funny little things that make me different from every other girl he could have. Like how I have a dorky laugh, I can’t watch gory movies, or the way my hair smells. All of the little things that he notices and adores. I want to be that girl. " ( courtesy of herdaheartss )

I got this from dearest waties' blog. So love, am i that girl stated above ? It's true y'know. Anyhoots, speaking about love i kinda miss spending time with him. Eversince we both working, we had lesser time spend together & obvious much i hate it. In 1 week ill be working for 5 day(s) & i only have 2 off day(s). Plus, he's schooling so its even harder for us. At work, i cant treat him as my boyfriend for the moment. That sucks even more. & i definitely miss huging him. Love i miss you ! I miss you more than ever . I miss your presence . Thinking of it just saddens me awhole lot. sigh. few more day(s) love ^^V you know i know lah kann. Love you much much ! mwahs (28x) ^^

random (:

2010-01-23T01:40:00.003+08:00

Listen up ladies & gents

The boy by the named of ;

MUHAMMAD NADZMIY
I LOVE YOU TODAY !

I LOVE YOU TOMORROW !

I LOVE YOU FOREVER, with god's willing (amin)

(L)(L)

youre mine mine mine, pronto {!}

happy with love

2010-01-21T23:26:00.002+08:00

You are every reason, every hope, and every dream ive ever had and no matter what happens to us in the future, every day we were together was the greatest day of my life love.

I've been busy lately with work. In 1 week i only got 2 day(s) off. So you can imagine how busy i am x) till i dont have the time to update.Anyhoots, work has been fun despite having to stand for long hours. & i've made a couple of friends already. On my fourth day of work, finally theres someone who accompanied me for lunch. Im thankful too that dad gave me green light to work till 10pm. Alhamdullilah.

Enough about work. Today went out to suntec with love. Afterwhich we headed down to bedok. Had so much of talking in the bus. Great time love great time ! I had so much fun today with love. Misses him already but good thing is im on the phone with him now. Im a happyhappyhappy girl yeh ! Love you much much. Mwahs mwahs (L)

(L)(L)

first day

2010-01-16T21:58:00.002+08:00

Im fatigue
i was lost for a moment just now
felt like crying for love's help ^^V
made a few friends
gundu as usual but im catching up
went home with love love love
am working tomorrow again
wonders if mimie has the same schedule as me or not
wonders if i should sleep now or later ?
misses love =PP
love, me

get what i want

2010-01-15T22:23:00.002+08:00

You wanna know whats really hard? Its when you want to express what you feel and all you can do is to shut up.

I finally got a job today and tomorrow shall be my first day of work. am definitely eager for it but am afraid things arent going the way it was meant to be due to a certain. It saddens me alot when i think back what happened today. One moment i was damn nervous then i was damn happy next i was damn sad. This is my very first job in my entire life, i am elated but....Pray hard for me things will be better tomorrow. I got what i wanted but im still upset. Great much ? Pfft~
xoxo.

dee pressed

2010-01-14T22:04:00.002+08:00

Do you know how depressing it is when your dad finally gave you the green light to work part-time yet you still had none ? Do you know how depressing it is when love could get job easily than me ? Do you know how depressing it is when you are so eager to work but even tho' u searched high & low but to no avail ? Do you know how depressing when some people pulled you down when infact they should motivate me? Do you know how depressing it is when you put high hopes on a particular job but in the end hopes were crushed ? I could go on but i guess i shall put a stop to this. I can go insane someday somehow, trust me. & i shall think positive about tomorrow's interview. Dear god, please let me get this job. I need $$ badly. amin.
Love, me.

Best actress (:

2010-01-09T20:01:00.002+08:00

“Absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it.”

Finally im back to blogging. No idea why lately i've no interest in updating my blog. However, whenever i keep looking at it i always felt like updating. Anyway, thanks dearest watie for the help just now. Much appreciated (:
Webcammed with love at 1 plus in the morning. Wanted to snap some photos but he wouldnt want it. Being able to look at his face literally made my elated. I just dont know why i keep on missing you.
Okay, yesterday met love as usual. Stayed at his crib while waiting for him to end school. Basically i was rotting there & finally he came back home. Ate our lunch then headed down to his grandmas' crib. Afterwhich, love taught me how to ride bicycle. Initially i was frustrated with him 'cause he keep on nagging at me but i should really have my thanks to him for teaching me till i got it right. Still, theres more to learn right love? Thank you for yesterday. I really enjoy it alot. & indeed i was a happy kiddo when ive finally able to cycle alone. Yes i dont know how to cycle, so who the f' care =D Im learning & im sure im able to cyle soon.
So lovelies, lets go for a cycling outing when ive learned how to cycle alright?

Youre such a good actress. How many people have you deceived with ur drama? Keep on making stories 'cause afterall thats what youre good at. Funny how you can be so contradict at times. Im tired of ur games. confident kapa girl ? shameless (insertawordyourself) =DDDDD

Love, me

free like a bird

2009-12-31T00:32:00.003+08:00

I don't know how to be fine when i'm not, 'cause i don't know how to make a feeling stop .

Im trying my best to not be a queen.control. Im trying my best to not control you too much. Im trying my best to not check your phone every single time we meet. Im trying my best to not hack into your account(s). 'cause you said you need space. you need some privacy. But on the other hand, have you ever thought/have it ever crossed your mind why i've been doing these absurd stuffs? The answer is in you. BUT wait congratulation, you finally made me stop doing these absurd things. It's NOT because i don't care, it's only because you said you needed space & privacy & so im giving you what you need/want. The urge/tempation is so definitely hard to resist, it's undenial. But don't you worry, i have it under control. So love, you can do whatever you want. You're free to do anything you have in mind but remember there should be a limit in everything you do. This time round i aint closing just one eye, im closing both my eyes. 'cause when i think back, afterall i dont really mean so much to you. That's why you have this feeling(s) when i control you. Remember, L I M I T S .
Dont go overboard. This is exactly what you want, dont you ?
Pronto

bummer

2009-12-30T00:27:00.003+08:00

I like to pretend that everything's all right, because when everybody else thinks you're fine, sometimes you forget for a while that you're not.

Today for the first time in my entire life, i woke up at near to 3pm ! Goodness, i slept like a pig man. Hah. Okay, thurs shall be a great day 'cause theres gathering over at mom's place. Alot of people will be there. That spells F U N ! Plus, c i n t a will also be there. Yay !

2009 will end tomorrow. I've yet list my '09 resolution. Oh well, I never need 'em anyway. This year seems to fly so fast. The next thing i know, its ending and another year is drawing nearer. In addition, c i n t a & me would be 1 year on 28 january '10. The longest. I just love you major much c i n t a. Anyhoots, i gotten back my results a few days back. Check it out aye.

(click for enlargement)

I got a D for my BEG. bummer. && i got 3.2 for my gpa. So hello higher nitec (:

xoxo.

eleven

2009-12-28T00:58:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 11 MONTHSARY C I N T A

I don't have to say much 'cause you should by now know that i love you.

i want no one other than you. I need no one other than you.

You carve a smile on my face with your cute face & cute behaviour.

I will never get tired looking at those adorable face c i n ta .

You are definitely the only one in my heart.

Happy 17th Birthday Siti Nursyameera

finally you turned seventeen. Hahaha. Much misses & love sweetpie ^^

with love, your s a y a n g (:

Tomorrow

2009-12-27T21:25:00.002+08:00

the feeling of being "okay" does not imply that the person has risen above all his/her faults and emotional problems. it merely implies that he/she refuses to be paralyzed by them

tomorrow is our day. tomorrow is our special day. Does tomorrow even means to you like how it means to me all these while ? You tell me . I've been thinking what you're doing, where were you and what you've been doing since i woke up. But i never heard anything from you. Why ?

the thanks

2009-12-26T21:01:00.002+08:00

watched alvin and the chipmunks 2
thank you love for the movie treat
thank you love for the caramel frappe @ starbucks.
thank you love for the lunch cum dinner treat
thank you love for the new earpiece
thank you love for the taxi fare
thank you love for today
I definitely enjoy my day today so much .
I was very happy .
love, edaa !

Just a day left (since its going to be midnight in 6 mins time)

you are my love

2009-12-22T12:21:00.010+08:00

21 Dec '09

Pasir Ris> Bugis > Esplanade > Home !

Outing with zieybby & Don (:

The one who picks me up when i fall out of love or life .

Written by dearest ziey, thanks dear (:

my wish (:

Ziey's wish (:

Aliyy Hadi's wish (:

so what's your wish love ? hmm...

Eziey Edaa Don ((:

Just like a sister to me.

Our master piece !

Okay, yesterday was a blast despite the lost we had. Thanks ziey for yesterday. Sadly, love couldn't make it 'cause he was simply fatigue after working from 10pm - 8am . It would be double the fun if love was there. ):

I get to meet love today. AHHHHH ! i miss him already ^^

Love,

edaa !

I know i'm not alone

2009-12-22T00:49:00.007+08:00

im thankful for the things thats happening. Especially the part where love & me are getting better. Our heart-to-heart talk did help us despite the tears, anger, sad and dissapointment. 2010 shall definitely be a new year for us . I thank you for giving yourself and myself another chance. Yes, i wouldnt want to live in denial that everything that happened did hurt me but its definitely a lesson learnt. You've promise, so love keep 'em this time round . I just can't imagine live without you . For this upcoming 28 Dec '09, obvious much it marks our 11 months together. Look at how time flies so fast. We're going to be 1 Year old in 37 day(s) time. You prolly know that you're the longest r'ship i ever had . Despite those feuds we had, my ugly attitude and your nasty temper we still manage to make it through . If we're able to go through this far so it should not be a problem for the upcoming future. I forgive you for the past . Besides, i was partly to be blame for what had happened . You're the only one i truly love. Believe me .
love,
edaa !

vans & ipod

2009-12-21T23:59:00.002+08:00

i want this two things so much ! anyone kind enough to buy for me ? :'(

I just wish for once love..

2009-12-19T20:36:00.003+08:00

I love you right from the day you've become mine...

I love you even when we're fighting...

I love you even when your words were harsh..

I love you even when you have those nasty temper...

Why can you never see it ?

:'(

lose control

2009-12-18T23:09:00.002+08:00

I'm still jobless right at this moment. It pissed me 'cause love could get a job so easily. I've applied a couple of job but got none . This real sucks especially when im so desperate to get a job ! pfft~
I can't wait to be home tomorrow. One of the reason is im missing my pillow(s), my smelly cat & definitely cant wait to meet love tomorrow. He'll be having his training for his new job on sunday. Im so green with envy.
I update when im home tomorrow alright. Ahyes, i've changed my blogskin again. Heh.

goodnight love(s) !

memories seep in my veins

2009-12-15T18:58:00.003+08:00

It's been almost a week since i last updated my blog. Currently sleeping over at my aunts house for a week. Met love today for our interview. Speaking of which, i haven't been receiving any calls from any company to do the job interview. This definitely shows a very bad sign. I neeed to get a part time job asap man ! I need $$,certainly do. On a brighter note, will be going for wing tai & part-time admin interview tomorrow @ tampines road & clark quay respectively. Hopefully am able to grab either one of the job *sighs*

Theres so many things that happened just now. Many sway things to be exact.

Shark went inside the mrt while i went out of the same mrt
had to quickly hop inside back
while climbing up the stairs in the bus, my shoe drop off.
i was almost hit by a darn motorcycle.
he did it on purpose. F' him !

Im waiting for love to call me right now. We're suppose to plan for tomorrow. Especially when i have to go back home to get my cert & testimonial. B, call me lei ! pfft ~

I know you want me to F & F but truly i can't forget even when i can forgive.The text keeps on haunting me. I always have this urge to text (insertname) & fuck (insertname) upside down but you never let me too. You said you want us to start afresh. I know that but try putting yourself in my shoes. The hurt, the anger and definitely the dissapoinment is not like any other times. I know you're sorry and i truly have forgiven you. I just want to be satisfied, to let go of these feeling(s). I really don't know......im confused. I don't want to make you mad 'cause i know for sure if i text (insertname) you'll surely be mad. Guess, i just have to let it go...for the sake of you.

Pronto.

rush

2009-12-09T21:22:00.003+08:00

i have a job interview tomorrow over at marks & spencer with love & mimie .
so wish my luck people . ^^
hp kena confiscated.
dont wanna talk about it, trust me.
i need a new prepaid .
i want to earn big bux fast.
im scared for tomorrow :S
& i (L) love more than words itself .
love, me (:

(L), ily !

2009-12-05T20:41:00.003+08:00

Just like this heart that never fails on beating, my love for you will never cease.
Met love today @ tampines. Things get bad when we were reaching our destination. Had our little feud which soon end up to be a big one. I don't know why you have the thought that my love for you isnt there anymore and theres no you in my heart. It hurts me when you thought that way. Well, maybe im never good in showing/expressing my love towards you. But only god knows how much i love you and this love of mine never fades, not even once. It never crossed my mind to find a new one. As said by you, find better than you. I dont need anyone better. I dont need handsome guys. I dont need cute guys. I just need you in my life, period. And why do you think that for these 10 months of our relationship, theres only tears rather than happiness.
Do you actually only see the part where i tears and not the part where i smile whenever you're with me ? Have you ever realise that ? Being in a relationship is definitely not easy as ABC. There's rough patches everywhere but we need to endure this love. I know i have to work on my ugly temperamental and yes im still working on it. Please love, i dont want goodbye(s) to be in our dictionary. I LOVE YOU and i mean it love. And im sorry for today, forgive me.

(L)

One Happiness, my babygirls !

2009-12-04T19:53:00.000+08:00

Mini picnic with babygirl(s) was an ultimate fun despite the heavy downpour plus the ugly floods which made the place dirty. Even so, we managed to perk up each and everyone emotions after we moved from PRP > Ehub ! The camwhoring session was a blast. Gawd, i miss being with you guys. :( Enough say, let the picture(s) do the talking ;D Girls, shall meet up soon alright ! (L)

There's moreeee... waiting for watie dear to upload the rest. ^^

listen.

2009-12-02T22:11:00.002+08:00

Happy belated 10 monthsary love !
waiting eagerly to watch saw 1 - 6 ^^
watched dreamgirl just now
took my power nap until love disturb me -.-
played taiti, he wins EVERYTIME !
had my hair highlighted, sis helped me out.
i dont think its very obvious, so good.
i want/need a new handphone please.
i need to do something with me hair.
i envied girls with long curly/wavy hair !!!!!
i miss my old long wavy hair.
&& lastly................
I LOVE MUHAMMAD NADZMIY BIN MOHD NADZIR VERYVERYVERY MUCHHH !
love, me (:

New Moon

2009-11-22T21:21:00.003+08:00

Jake is sucha cutaye while edward is sucha hottaye ! Goodness, im going head over heels over 'em. Currently watching new moon. Yes, it's out at the website. For sure, i'll be watching it again when it's release in theatre. Never will get bored over it. && no idea why, i have this urge to re-read all book again. Especially starting from new moon. Anybody has the book, kindly alert me. tyvm !

sidetrack; Love is definitely M.I.A. Tried to call him just now but couldnt reach him. Me no likey at all ): feel so lonely, so forlorn, so empty without him. I just wanna hear his voice to perk up my emotions. Love, where you go? I miss you soo much !

*sobsob*

2012

2009-11-22T15:11:00.003+08:00

" The most eloquent silence; that of two mouths meeting in a kiss."

Finally watched 2012 yesterday at cathay ehub with sister and her boyfriend. Sadly, love couldn't make it so i was literally alone at the theatre. I rate the movie 4/5. A good movie to watch, there's some sad parts that made me in tears. I shall have my thanks to sis for the treat ^^ Afterwhich, head straight to tampines. Slack around before heading to simpang bedok for dinner. That was basically my first ever time went/ate there. Not really that nice but thanks again for the treat.

Im certainly bored right now. I dont know what to do. Feel like watching movie but i got no idea what movie to watch. And love is M.I.A for now. -.-" Call me lah wey, im superb boreeed right now. I'll update other time.

Taggy replies//

eziey; I pon dah tgk ngn my sis. fun kaaaan ! dating eh ngn don don don ! ^^
demi; awwwh, suresure. you takecare too !
esah..!; ermm..nie esah mane eh ?

stay my baby

2009-11-20T20:46:00.005+08:00

" If you love someone you take the whole package. "

Planned to watch 2012 today was sadly cancelled 'cause we were all penniless people. saddening much ? i know. But as always, i have other alternatives to watch it. ^^ Im left with 2 more paper and im done with my course ! Goodness, time do flies so fast. In a few weeks time, i have to bid farewell to my felow classmates. *sobsob* Molly planned to take admin next year just like me. Hopefully we'll be able to be in the same class or else either of us will opt for it. I pray that i would at least get a 3.8 or 4 for my gpa points. Insya'allah.

Im missing my secondary school friends alot. I've seen their prom outfits and i must say everyone look awesome. How i ever wish i was there with 'em. It will be a total fun. I see that people have change alot huh. Too many stories heard but i just hope & pray everything will goes well soon for 'em. If you guys happen to stumble upon my blog and read this, me would like to say I MISS YOU GUYS MAJORLY MUCH !
i miss ZIEY !! i miss watie i miss ain i miss demi i miss arina i miss yana i miss farah. i miss being with you guys. Meet up soon please sweetpie. Much misses (L)

ps; baby dont leave ):

xxxx

Time

2009-11-19T21:13:00.003+08:00

" Love isn't finding a perfect person. It's seeing an imperfect person perfectly "
I know my current blog song is a veryvery old song but who the heck cares. I love it 'cause its meaningful. It's just how the way i feel all these while. So love, this song is dedicate to you.

MDP exam today was considered easy. Only that its too wordy till i almost doze off while typing. && today was another cold day and of cause i regretted not bringing my jacket yet again ! I had those instincts to bring it today but me being so lazy ignore 'em. So, had to endure the cold wind. Met love as usual at his crib. I just love being by his side. Looking at his adorable face. *day dreaming*

sidetrack: sometimes i wish we doesnt need to fight. sometimes i wish we would be happy always together. sometimes i wish you would only love me. sometimes i wish i hadn't had these ugly attitude. sometimes i wish you don't have those nasty temper. sometimes i wish i know how to make things right instead of messing things up. sometime i wish you realise how true my love is for you. sometime i wish you knew how much is my love for you. sometime i wish i have the power to turn back time.

i'll be okay. Don't worry (:

cut the gap and zip it.

2009-11-16T22:50:00.003+08:00

" it takes two to walk hand in hand "
Today was such a cold day ! I should have brought loves jacket along, darn it. For a moment it felt as if i wasn't at singapore instead i was at genting highland. Speaking of which, i miss going to genting highlands. It's been donkey years since i last went there. *sigh* Daddy, when will you bring us there again ? We miss going to holidays & we miss going there. ='(

Let's push that aside. BEG test today was a killer. I don't have the confidence whether i'll pass with flying colours or prolly not. Nevermind. I shall now concentrate more on POA & BEO. Both are a tough subject but if i try my best, god's willing i'll pass. 2 weeks left ! Thinking of it just terifies me alot. I.must.do.my.upmost.best !

Many unpleasant/horrible/ugly things have been happening lately during this short 1 year course. Friendships are breaking here and there. I almost lost mine but thankfully we managed to sort things out. I learned that regardless of someone's ugly flaws, we still should accept 'em for who they are. Nobody's a perfectionist & everybody make mistake. Cherish every friendship that you gain. I used to say crude words on a couple of my friends that i totally dislike but when i think back, it's no use. You're with 'em for only a year. So why fill it with unpleasant memories ?
Just forgive and forget.

xoxo

your world is my world

2009-11-15T17:41:00.003+08:00

" Love fills you up with hope and happiness. "
Yesterday, spent my entire day with love ! Was sposed to meet him up at my void deck @ 8.30 am however he arrived at 7.30am and at that point of time i was still sleeping. Yes of cause love was pissed. HAHA. sorry love ^^V Overall, had lotsa fun with him. Imagine from 8.30am to 11plus pm. Goodness, its called h e a v e n manxz !
Even tho' we had little arguments when we're at chomel choosing the appropriate gift still much thanks to him for paying for it.

We had our fun after the arguments. Seriously. I know he knows public don't. I really really enjoy the moment with him. && thanks love for the cute small bear ! anyhoots, sisto went to bugis yesterday and she bought the wallet i wanted to buy. The 2 for 10bux. So she gave me one. wohooo ! thanks sis !! ^^

wna watch Fantastic four.
&& love said he's the human torch.
*giggles*

love,
me (:

my addiction

2009-11-13T22:55:00.002+08:00

" There is only one happiness in life -- to love and to be loved "
i dont know where to start but for sure i feel like blogging.okay so, today met up with babyboy at his crib. Had lotsa fun for sure. Played taiti with usuals & i dont know why my skills are digrading. && i hate it whenever baby wins all the time 'cause its just that im pissed i got rotten lucks. Shall push that aside besides it's just a game right baby ? ^^

will be meeting him again tomorrow ! *jumps around* no idea why, but i never get tired meeting him for almost the entire week. However, i felt like it's a blissed to have the chance to meet you. I always tend to miss him whenever we're not by each other sides. I misses his warm embrace, his baby smell armpit (its true ! ) && especially his sweet addictive kisses. Whenever i'm with him, i would never feel like letting him go. I'll continue hugging him all day long . And fyi, i miss him right now ! no kid.

next week friday, planned to watch 2012 instead since new moon released only on 3 december. Its such a dishearten news. On a bright side, maybe ziey will be tagging along ! yayness, can't wait yehs.

im planning to have my beauty sleep right now.
goodnight people & goodnight love !

smelly boo boo

2009-11-10T23:11:00.004+08:00

" I'm breathless without your presence, lost without your guidance and empty without your attention. "

Gosh. Why am i always too fatigue to update when i reached home ? Guess, i had a long day afterall. Hehs. Life's been good thanks to love(s). Final exams are in december !!!! I'm left in about a couple of weeks before the major day. Goodness ! And im so no prepared yet ! I still have awhole chunk of notes to remember. Like the topic from the beginning to the very end. Depressing much ? Ya'think ? -.-" Let's moved on to the next chapter ^^

I've watched paranormal activity. Yes indeed it wasn't a satisfying one and certainly not worth the bux to watch it in theatre. I can't wait for new moon to be out in theatre on november 20. Guess what people ? I received two invitation to watch movie on the very same day.1)my babygirls planned to watch new moon on the day it is release. 2)girlfriend invited me to watch 2012 with her and the rest. So, im still thinking which to go 'cause for sure i want to watch both badly ! Maybe i shall discuss this with my adviser - babyboy !! haha.

speaking of him, he's having his beauty sleep right now. Being with him today was such a beautiful/enjoying momentum. Idk why i felt that way but yehs. 6 minutes before midnight. I should probably get my beauty sleep. Theres swimming lessons tomorrow, so have to wake up early.

goodnight people & sweetdream love !

new skin

2009-11-06T23:35:00.002+08:00

hello sweetheart(s). I think im atleast done editing my blogskin. Took me quite awhile to edit everything. pfft. Ohh wells, i love my new skin anyway. Ahyes, kindly tag me your new links to be linked. I lost it so yehs. Enough said, exams are drawing nearer and i aint too sure whether im up to it or not. Last few days, baby got a bad piece of news. & im really sad for him too but whatever baby. Don't be discouraged or disheartened okay ? I'm sure your appeal will be a success. Dont lose hope alright baby ? I'm always here for you whether you need me or not (: I'll update the pictures we took today prolly tomorrow. Im fatigue, i need my beauty sleep !

xoxo.

dotdot

2009-11-03T22:42:00.001+08:00

i know im very fickle minded
i'll do a proper update prolly tomorrow ^^
i'll change the blogskins tomorrow too
im tired
goodnight sweetheart(s)

quizze(s)

2009-11-01T22:11:00.000+08:00

Your Life is Unsatisfying

It seems like your life has hit a rough patch, and you're really not enjoying things the way you should.
There's a good chance you are depressed, because little is making you happy these days.
Consider seeking counseling or changing things up a bit. You need a new point of view.
You need to connect more deeply with the world around you to feel truly satisfied in life.

the bold point is so very true.

Falling Apart at the Seams

You are finding all the stress hard to cope with now, hopefully it will all blow over and sometimes you feel you are about to burst, but betrayal and depression is getting the better of you.

Another bold point that is true.

Your Life is Better Than 75% of All People

You really have things pretty good - so stop a minute and appreciate how great your life is.
You likely have a cheery outlook, supportive friends, and plenty to keep you happily busy.
You are usually content - and with good reason. You have a lot to be happy about.
So when things don't go well, remember that you have it better than most people!

yeh right. as if -.-

nine birth

2009-10-28T22:10:00.000+08:00

Spiderman has mary jane. superman has louis lane. and you have me.

This was suppose to be done yesterday however i was down with flu and so i was unable to update. Yesterday marks our 9 month birth together. WE've gone through so much obstacles and so i hope that you'll be able to go through it with me even furthur. Yes i know my behaviour could be such a pain in your ass. So i thank you for enduring it all these while. I believe with your help, am able to get rid of those ugly behaviour. As for you my dear love, you have to get rid of those nasty temper of yours. You promised to control 'em, so mark your words love. Enough said, i think by now i don't have to state everything 'cause you should jolly well know that my love is only for you. I can say other guys are hot, cute, etcetc but always bare in mind that you're always the hottest and the cuttest to me. I (L) you babyboy. Please don't give up on me as i never gave up on you. You'll always be in my heart baby. mwahs !

sidetrack: I.WANT.MY.BLOODY.HAIR.TO.GROW.BACK.FASSSSSSST!darnyou`

short but yet sweet(:

2009-10-27T22:09:00.000+08:00

im.very.tired.right.now ! i want to have my beauty sleep but at the same time i want to wait for babyb to end work. few more mins b, few more mins. ^^ Initially, im all hyped-up to go for swimming lesson tomorrow but no idea why, im 50/50 to go. And ohh yeh, i so can't wait to meet babyb tomorrow. miss him like shitxzxz manzxz !!!! i know you don't but i hell do ! We have to work things out baby and improve our relationship. I'm sure you don't want us to continue being like this right? Endless feuds/argument(s), we shall put a stop to it right ? Let's do one step at a time. First stop, our tempremental behaviours. Let's work work work it out baby !!!! I (L) youuuuuuuuuuu ~ mwahs.

nadzmiy ♥

2009-10-25T22:09:00.000+08:00

Baby i'm yours tonight, tomorrow and forever ♥

Whatever you said today makes so much sense. And i apologise for what i did. You see, it's not that i have zero trust in you. Infact, i do trust you but there's still doubt in it. You can't blame me for having this feelings. You did what i don't like but like what you said it's the past. What you said is true, present won't come if i don't let go of the past. Im holding on to it for far too long and im preety sure that it's time for me to let it go. Let it free, let the past just be a history. Trusting is the most important thing in a relationship. And like what you said, there's no point being together when there is no trust between us. I know i've been silly to do things like that but trust me, it's not that i don't trust you at all. I just have my doubts. Going to a seperate ways is never an option of mine. We've promised love, that we'll go through hardships be it the biggest , smallest, or painest problems TOGETHER. So, i'm not going back on my words. are you ? a few more day love to our 9 months birth. Do you really want to see all our memories we've built just go down the drain like that? You should know by now how much you mean to me. How much i love you and how much i wouldn't want to lose you. Please, NEVER say those words ever again. It shall never be in our dictionary.

xoxox.

fact

2009-10-23T22:08:00.000+08:00

uncertain thoughts will rule your mind today.

Today's advice - " Forgive even if you can't forget. "

a small note.

2009-10-16T22:07:00.000+08:00

Take one moment at a time. Give more than is expected.

i don't know whether i should get mad. i don't know what to react. I wouldn't want us to have those feud(s) 'cause afterall we had enough don't we? But i'm not good in pretending that i'm alright with it. I prefer shutting myself up rather than fighting with you. I know, you said she's just a friend but this heart of mine just wouldn't accept it. deal with it edah, deal with it.

b, much thanks to you for buying me food today. And surprisingly, we didnt even had any feud(s) today. A good achievement i must say, right ? i don't know if you know this and i don't know if you realise this. my love for you is more than the word itself. Perhaps, im just not good in showing it. I prefer getting myself scolded by you rather than you not wanting to care about me anymore.

There's many to be said, but i think it's best to stop here. As for the rest, i'll just deal with it myself. Don't worry, i'll be fine preety soon. preety preety soooooon.

nights sweetheart(s)

sweet seventeen

2009-10-14T22:06:00.000+08:00

im finally updating my dusty wusty blog ^^ . sorry yeh for being MIA for awhile. hehs. im finally sweet seventeen ! yay ! so thanks to those who wished me & thanks to my babygirls & babyB for the pressie. I must say, i love every gift that i received. Second sis bought for me a new show from everlast !!!! goodness, i (L) it manzxz ! And now i owned 3 perfume, me likey dohh ! alright. actual fact, i dont know what to update. im updating this just for the sake of updating. Many things had happened ya'see but being the typical me, i forgotten about it.

i'll update next time alright ?

(L) me (:

i'll.be.okay(:

2009-10-02T22:06:00.000+08:00

nobody said that it'd be easy that we could find a way, make a way

Wednesday

Accompany b to his mom work place to get her assignment & mrt-ed to tanjong pagar. Had an impromptu plan with ziey baby to catch a movie at ehub. Double date - me & b , ziey & ali baba =D Initial plan was to watch Gin notti but plan was cancelled since we arrived there late. Then decided to watch phobia 2. First ever time sat at couple seat so jakons abit ^^. Movie, overall rated was 5/5 . Darn scary and the last part was darn funny. Afterwhich, walked to PRP to slack around. Reached home at 7.45pm.

Thursday

Thought would be rotting at home for the entire day but surprising only for half of the day. Went over to b house at 7plus pm then headed to PP to makan with his family. It was his mom birthday so had those outings. Ate at a thai restaurant, the food was preety good . Had to be home at 10pm, so cabed back home with b, so thank you very much b for sending me back home ^^

Friday

Spent my entire day at home rotting as usual. But lucky me, i found a new entertain - Watch meteor shower. I'm addicted to it already and planning to watch it till the wee hours. Played a small game with sis & surprisingly the answer for it was preety true. Test b on it too, dont want to reveal the answer. i'm came second in your mind huh ? Its okay, truths out b. im fine. dont worry (:

xxxx

dwell on it no more

2009-09-29T22:04:00.001+08:00

Im in serious need of bux !!!!! c i n t a will start his new work tomorrow, so love break a leg ! He got his haircut today and he definitely looks so very cute. He looks younger now, not like abang - abang anymore =P I reached his place near 8am. Initial plan was to have my power nap but unfortunately my eyes wouldn't shut. darn it. & Instead of me getting the power nap, love doze off while putting me to sleep -.-" thanks dohh ! The bicycle ride with him to his grandma house to and fro was an ultimate blast. I can't wait to meet you again.....next week ? haha.

sidetrack; i wont dwell on it no more. I just want us to be happy. 8 months and still counting. Dear god, please don't let anyone ruin my relationship. I love him too much to let him go.

xxx

eighth, love!

2009-09-28T22:01:00.000+08:00

HAPPY THE 8TH BABYBOY ♥♥♥♥♥♥

twentyeightzeroonezeronine 280109 twenty8zero1zero9

love.love.love.love.love.love.love ♥♥♥♥♥

i dont want nothing except for you 'cause you're the best damn thing that's happening in my life. We shall not give up ! love you alotsxz babyboy !! You're mine & forever will. I wont let you fall at some bitches clutches. no one can break us apart baby !

Love;

your one & only babygirl.

overdue

2009-09-27T22:01:00.000+08:00

Overdue pictures .

i'll upload the rest next time dohhh ^^

raya

2009-09-25T22:00:00.000+08:00

And when I'm with you baby, every second matters.

Went out for jalan raya with secondary school friends yesterday. It was an ultimate fun for sure! Total number of people were 10 - myself, ziey,watie,arina,wani,yanaa,ain,amirah,demi & sakinah.I'm a lazy ass right now so i will summarise everything.

houses we went accordingly;

Ain
Watie
Sakinah
Ridhwan
Zamir
liyana

last house ate macaroni goreng & goodness i ate two times *blush* Yes, i do eat alot and i tend to get hungry after every 2 or 3 hours. I don't know why but i'm just like that. Reached home at 7.30pm and im a happy kiddo 'cause i managed to reach home before 8pm ! so daddy don't have a reason to disallowed me going out next time with ma friends. hehs ^^V

wont elaborate about today, just one word - awesome ! i love my day & i love my babyboy. Thank you babyb for carving a smile on my face today. && we'll be jalan raya together tomorrow to a certain place =D pink eh pink !

sidetrack; you're just a 14 year old kiddo so act like one. I'm done with you so im hoping the ties with you and the person concern are done too. A little piece of advice, start respecting people who are older than you. I'm letting you go 'cause i don't want to dwell on the matter any longer. Simply, you're just a waste of my precious time. Your words that are said to me are plainly rude, but it's okay. What to expect from a 14 year old kid who's just about to grow up (: sekarang zaman rilek dohh ! bare that in mind kiddo ! ^^

xoxo.

baby.dont.leave

2009-09-19T21:59:00.000+08:00

if i told you that i loved you,
would you turn and walk away?
if i said how much you mean to me,
would you hesitate to stay?

if i told you that i cut myself,
would you even shed a tear?
if i were in the hospital,
would you even feel the fear?

if i said i was gonna die,
would you stay through the night?
if i were in danger,
would you keep me in your sight?

im telling you that i love you,
i just want you to see.
so please dont walk away right now,
you mean a-lot to me.

baby, you musn't leave me. Dont have any negative thinking, 'cause nothing is true. Theres only one thing that is true, and its my love towards you. You must believe me that i always love you no matter what happens. You said you're not a good guy. someone who is uncaring, not understanding,vulgar and you always hurt me. It's not true. i've always find you the best one amongst my ex(s). You're not bad at all, you're the greatest ! love you so much babyboy !

small note

2009-09-17T21:47:00.000+08:00

i hate this feeling i'm having right now. As much as i want to ignore it, it still wont go away. I just wish you'll understand this feeling of mine baby. I dont blame you for the things thats happening right now, 'cause afterall im the one to be blame. Like you said, you don't feel like this is our relationship. Lately thing's have been rough for me and for you. Never imagine that things would happen that way, but on the other hand i'm glad that things are at least over. We're back to normal, well maybe not really. I don't know what else im supposed to do but a thing for sure, i will never want to give up. I'm just at my wits end, that's why i seek help. Little did i know, it only made you go even far. Everytime i say things, things that i feel, you'll say that its merepek, me-repek merepk . Yeh, im full on nonsense so i better shut my self up and suck it up . I want us to be like before and i want your love for me to be like before. But things have changed don't they ? im a loser. I just cant make things right instead i messed things up. i hate those girls who cant get their filthy hands off you. i hate those girls who doesnt seems to know basic english such as - ATTACHED ! Just remember this little piece of advice, i have my own limits, just dont crossed over it. Same goes to YOU . for now, i shall closed on one eye and pretends nothing happens. i'll still smile, i'll still laugh but god knows what's happening inside me. This just hurts me & i.cant.stand.looking.at.it.any.longer ! if you're having plans on getting me pissed or hurt me, it's working alright. you can do whatever but i'll still love you ! bare that , ty .

xxxx

point form

2009-09-16T21:45:00.000+08:00

i'll update prolly after hari raya
i have alot of notes to remember
i don't think im prepared to take my beo exam tmr
i feel like eating again....
but at the same time, i feel like sleeping Zzzzz
nono, i must stay awake.
must study for tomorrow exam !
i miss my babyboy
me & him are finally back to normal
i can't wait to go hari raya outing with him
and also with my ite babes
& not forgetting my secondary school friends.
i want to hug my babyboy.
i miss hugging him .
i think i shall end this.
love, me (:

suck it up

2009-09-09T21:43:00.000+08:00

When you're cold and your heart is sore, warm it up with L O V E

I'll be having BEG test tomorrow so it means hafta wear formal attire. I'll be dreading it for sure, trust me. Hopefully everything will goes well. Be it the attire, the interview and not forgetting the make up ! I just want to at least pass this test and get it done and over with. Then next i'll have to worry about is BEO CA. i.must.study.hard.for.it or else im dead. sigh. There's so many things yet so little time and ohh finally we've submitted our PM1 project.That's definitely a sigh of relief and one burden off my shoulder. Ahhkay, i better stop talking about exams. Just hate thinking about it larh kay !

Babyboy currently at geylang. He called me just now happily saying he broke the record - finally set his foot in geylang ! Lol sia B. && he even said to me pelan - pelan kayoh just because i havent set my foot in there. Tak mati uhs B tak gie sane ! =P Don't you dare flirt behind my back or even whatever you called it - cuci mata . A big NONO okay ! get this straight in your head baby . haha. And B, very much thank you for letting me meeting you today finally am able to let go of my missingness yet it's still not enough =( Well, its okay this friday we shall meet up alright ? I love you babyboy ! more than ever !!

xoxo

seven years old

2009-08-28T21:39:00.000+08:00

THE SEVENTH !

BG Lve BB !!

today is a significant day for you and me. We're seven months old now and still counting. We've gone through so much obstacles in our r'ship. Tho' sometimes letting go did came across our mind sometimes but our love is strong enough to hold it back. I never regret being with a guy like you. We still have some flaws to work on baby. We can do this and we musn't give up. I know i can be verrrry stubborn at times. But im glad you able to tolerate it all. I love you too much already. And you're definately the only one i want to spent in my entire life babyboy. mwaaahs !

YoursTruly;

battlefield

2009-08-27T21:38:00.000+08:00

Love is like a battlefield - many will suffer for the cause, but only those who work together will prevail.

today, i couldn't wake up early to attend BEG. So unfortunately had to give it a miss. Woke up at around 9am and hurriedly bathe and changed. Afterwhich took bus 12 together with mimie to school. Got back the POA test, and sadly i flunk badly. Usually my marks will be more than 80% but this time round it's only 61%. am very dissapointed with myself i tell you. But i have to face the music 'cause afterall i brought this upon myself. I didnt really study for the test and only flip through the notes on the day itself. As for BEO, that's another dissapointment. I failed the prog test even badly than POA. Goodness edah, what's wrong with you? Your grades are degrading lately. I must buck up! I can do this, i must not and never give up. sigh. This is hopeless, seriously. No matter how much mantra i chant, things won't change. The stress is at the brink and i'm having splitting headaches. im hopeless, i can't do this. i know i can't ! Enough of all this, i need a break. definitely !

tomorrow should be a happy day for me. 'cause it marks something meaningful in my life. I don't know if he remembers about it. We had a tiff today for god knows why. I think after what happened today, i preety sure of my decision. Baby, i don't want to hurt you any longer. I don't want to make you mad anymore. I don't want you to fight with me any longer. I guessed it's enough. You're tired of it, same goes to me. Let's stop all these. We shall be happy always, treasuring every moments and spend time together wisely. And so, i will be the girl that can be so hurt but can still look at you and smile. The girl who is willing to brighten up your days even if i can't brighten my own. I rather keep things all by myself than to lose you. I'm sorry too for scolding you today, i know i have zero rights to do so. forgive me.

xoxo.

too lost in you

2009-08-25T21:38:00.000+08:00

And it's true, the only person I ever wanted was you.

I can't believe i actually finished all the task(s) that i had to do. Like, finding eight recipies for my PM1 project and find another five company for BEO so called 'homework'. OMG ! I actually did it everything in less than an hour. ^^V am definitely a happy kiddo ! haha. Today school start at twelve. Mimie came over to my crib at around 11 then we headed school together. POA test was effing tedious. Really regretful for not studying it throughly and only studied it last minute.
Shall just keep praying that i would at least get a passing mark. BEO was hilarious in the beginning, seriously. Couldn't stop laughing with all those inside jokes given. But soon after, it's get back to business mode. boring as ever, i could fall asleep any moment. Zzzzz. End school at 2pm, then headed down to pasir ris with mimie. Slack for awhile, bought food and head home. Was about to sleep when zieybby IM me . Said she was bored and wants to come over to my house. So yeh she did. Break fast with her whilst watching 'underworld' . oh yeh, my cat - boy, cried just now. No idea why but he really did . Can see the tears forming in his eyes, and fall to his 'cheeks'. Poor thing. Must be feeling so down i guess. HAHA. crap (:

I've been having less talks with babyboy. He's just busy with his work so i can't blame him. He got work to do, school to attend and he needs adequate rest. Of cause it's really hard for him to find time for us to talk all day long. On a brighter note, at least am able to talk to him before he goes work. YES ! talked to him just now before he goes work. Gawd i miss him =( I want this 1 month to go by real fast. I miss being by his side, miss pinching him, miss biting him and the list goes on.... I just hope i'm not forgotten by him. Hope that no matter where he is, im still in his heart and mind. 'cause for sure he is definitely in my heart and mind always. Last but not least, i hope that his love towards me won't fade. =( dy, i love you more than ever. meet up soon please *sobsob*

need my beauty sleep. Nights pople *inside joke* (:

like i always do

2009-08-24T21:37:00.000+08:00

I have a thousand reasons to cry. But theres that one reason i keep smiling, him.

I'm a happy goob today ! 'cause there's lotsa nice food. I ate rice with asam pedas ikan pari, fried vegy & paru goreng. Afterwhich, i ate a small portion of dendeng and kebab. And now, sis bought back home double cheese burger for me. OMG ! i can go fat with this kind of rate im eating. Me likey baybeh ! haha. As i mention earlier on, i'll be updating once i've reached home. So here i am ! hehs. I'm supposed to be in panic mode right now 'cause i'm left with 11 days to finish up my PM1 project which we've not yet even start. Imagine, 11 more days to come up with 20 new recipies and another 20 different recipies. My brain's are going haywire sooon. nono, not again. im procrastinating agaaaain ! *sobsob* i.can.do.this. Shall chant that matra everyday. hah.

My babyboy working right now. saddening tho' cause i managed to talk to him on the phone for merely awhile. I miss him a whole lot. Maybe, just maybe i'll be breaking fast with him this wednesday. I miss hanging out with him, lazing around with him and importantly.....play taiti with him! tho' sometimes i can't hide with this denial that when everytime he wins over and over again, i get aggitated yet i know, this is just plainly a G A M E ! im over it okay. hahs.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I've been having blur vision lately. And my head felt soo heavy. Is something wrong with me or what? haish. i got no idea. i think i better rest right now. goodnight people(s) :)

YoursTruly;

one love, one heart

2009-08-23T21:35:00.000+08:00

Let's set the record straight. No one makes me smile quite like you do.

Currently at school. Am suppose to do some brochures thingy but heck, it's so hard to do. I don't know what i must include in it and what'snot. All i could think about right now is to get my power nap. Early in the morning sna.ayda called me up, so called wake up call lahs. She keeps on blabbering at me to wake up, keep on calling me a badak but i doze off. So right after we hung up, i went straight to the bathroom. Afraid i might doze off again and might not wake up any sooner. Came school late, as usual. HAH. It's our usual routine lately. Don't blame us, blame the bus driver for driving so sloooow =P

I'm not sure if dy woke up already by now. He should be or else he's dead meat i tell ya'. Didn't get to talk to him the whole day yesterday. Sadded much. He had to work from 1pm - 11pm i suppose. By the time he ends work, i'm already having my beauty sleep. But he did call me for merely awhile, to remind me to recite the niat. thank you dy for reminding me everyday ! Ah yes, he asked me to ask my dad wheather im able to break fast with him next monday. 'cause he said he wants to celebate syakir and the rest birthday(s). must be including him uhs ? haha. Hopefully am able to go. I would feel very bad if i can't go and celebrate his birthday even tho' it's an advance birthday celebration, but still !!!

okay i better get back to work. Shall update again once i've reached home okay? For this one month, i'll be a good girl by going home straight right after school. No more lepak-ing 'cause obviously it's the fasting month and so it's unappropriate to do so right? hehs. adios honeykins (:

not a matrep

2009-08-21T21:28:00.000+08:00

When the world falls down around you, I want you to know that I'll be there to help you pick everything back up.

Tomorrow is the start of fasting month. So it means for approximately two months, i wont get to meet dy. Will miss him so much obviously. This will be an ultimate challenge for both of us. We must overcome it together okay dy? Remember even if we're far apart, you're forever in my heart . Two months will go by fast. Tho' i very well know that time will go by real slow, i just have to bare with it don't i ? You must always take care of yourself okay? Don't over-work yourself, remember to always get adequate rest. We must talk on the phone every night to release our missing-ness for each other ! hehs. i love this picture that i took. Looks like a matrep but naaahs, sanji is NOT a matrep aye?

i don't know why but im getting lazier to attend school but i know i have too. I must get a good gpa points to go to higher nitec, i must do it! I must not procrastinate any longer. I have 2 projects to be done that's due in two weeks time, if im not wrong. Plus, we've not yet started for the PM1 project. Luckily for BEO we are half way done. I can't wait to finish up all these projects. They're giving me splitting headaches. me no likey !

im tired.tired.tired.tiredddddd ! i want sleeeeeep. haha. but i can't 'cause i want to talk to smelly boy lateron. Ahhyess, i enjoy spending time together with you today! Love you dy ! mwaaaahs . =DDDDD

good day people !